2014..... Let's Do This

The end of one year, the beginning of another.  A chance to reflect and a chance for renewal. So many get wrapped  up in the miraculousness of the ball dropping and the promise that the second hand advancing into the next group of 365 days can bring. There is something magical about that hope.  That one second........

I stopped writing last year.  I never stopped thinking or looking for a creative outlet but I was stuck.  How much do I share?  I am forever in awe of people that share so much.  Is there no filter? Do they not know what is appropriate? Do they just not give a damn? Maybe they just draw the line at a different point.

I wish that could be me some days.  I am forever considering how things I say will be viewed or interpreted.  I am critical of myself and my thoughts and words before anyone else gets the chance to see or hear them.  I imagine just about everyone's reaction before I press the 'publish' key.  Will they be offended?  Will they be hurt? Shocked?  Do I really want everyone to know what is going on in my head and in my heart?  Is anyone going to care?

So 'they' say that you shouldn't let the little things get to you. Look at the big picture, 'they' say.  Did 'they' every think that the big stuff is made up of a whole mess of little things?  We are formed by every single experience.  Our perception of the moment is formed by every moment that came before.

 

 

I looked around me today.  At the dishes in the sink, the Christmas tree still decorated but not lit for days, the laundry that needs to be put away, the dog that causes the vacuum to run daily and the flowers that never got pruned before the frost and for once it didn't make me crazy.  I didn't make a list in my head of how to get to it all.  I looked around more and saw pictures on the wall and remembered where they came from. I saw the paint on the wall and remembered the days it took to get the stripes just right.  I saw candle sconces and remember deciding where to hang them.  The story behind every piece of my surroundings was magnified.

 

So does the start of a new year erase that?  Is it supposed to or are you supposed to remember, savor and move forward with that in your heart giving you strength? 

 

 



Some people choose a word to help guide them in the coming year.  Some set a goal to achieve. Each year, it is the same for me. I want only to be a better version of myself.



Reflection:

I ran more races.  I focused on overall fitness and better eating.  I tried new things.  I made more efforts to see friends. I let go of negative people.  I laughed a lot and I probably did an equal amount of crying.  I watched my baby blossom and become even more amazing. I became

more forthright with my feelings. I let people in a little more. I grew.

 

 

Renewal:

I will continue to run.  I will continue on the fitness and food path I am on. I will keep trying new things....keep making plans with friends...keep laughing and crying.  I will be open to change more than I have and I will foster the blossoming little girl I am so lucky to have in my life.

Each of the things I do, I will do with more strength and determination than ever.

 

And the people I have let in.... I do need you.  You have helped form me.  Good and bad.  So enjoy the happy days with me and be there to comfort me on the bad.  I will do the same for you.

 

xoxo ~h