my beautiful girl



winter pix

 

 

 

 



Welcome Connor!! (congrats, Mel & Bry)

My sis and brother-in-law just had a baby which means that I am officially an Aunt...yay!!  His name is Connor and these pics were taken approx. 19 hours after he arrived.  Giada and I got to visit for a short time but more pics and stories are forthcoming.

Cousins

Monkey Toes

 

 



Monday picture fun

Still playing!  Not much to say about these as they're fairly self-explanatory.

 

 



 

(blurry but I still love)
 



Ahhhhh...finally

Back in the swing of things with pics.  The computer and I are friends again and even better, my new program and I are getting along nicely.  I found an amazing site that offers lots of tips, tutorials and webinars.  I took the first webinar last week and played a lot this week with the program.  I'm taking the class again tonight.....not a re-broadcast but a live class again.   Now that I have a clue about what I am doing, I feel like I will learn more and can ask better questions to improve further. As with anything, practice makes perfect so please give me your feedback and patience as I work to make my photos better in content, editing and composition.

Winter skies are among my favorite.  The colors are far more intense than any other season and I am very luck to have a beautiful vantage point for the sunrise.  I can't capture enough of the beauty and I find myself taking pictures almost daily in hopes to never lose the feeling I get from watching the sun light up the sky and starting my day with hope.

 

 

Pomegranate. The epitome of working hard and feeling like you get so little for what you have invested in time and frustration. The payoff is there though.  The taste and texture of those little seeds is like nothing else.  Have you tried them frozen?  Even more fun.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday was packed with activities.  We started with soccer and a trip to the diner.  So much cleaning had to be done so as I worked at that, Giada needed to have something to occupy her.  How about a hallway of paper to color to her heart's content?  As artistic director, she enlisted Kris as a model and me as the photographer/ flower and planet draw-er. 

  



In between drawings, Giada needed a break so working with Kris to get her Hello Kitty Chia pet started was perfect.  I have never had a Chia Pet so this bizarre experiment is just as exciting to me and I can assure that you will be seeing future pics of this critter.

Phew. I feel great not struggling with this any more and now I just feel overwhelmed by all of the past pictures I know I want to go back and edit.  Refreshed and excited about my camera again so I hope that this inspiration will allow me to improve my skills and vision.  You thought I always had a camera with me before? Obsessed now.

Question Four

"What is your most embarrassing or funniest moment?"

For a lazy Monday, this is probably the easiest question I could have gotten.  I know exactly the story I will share.  Some of you have heard this before but it's worth re-telling anyway.  I will share this with my daughter someday but if it applies now, please impart this knowledge on your children.  I was embarrassed enough for hundreds and yes mom, you were right.......

I would have to guess that I was in 5th grade.  As any girl will tell you, our crushes start young.  Until this grade, I had a crush on one boy in particular.  We met in kindergarten and lived close enough that I could consider him a neighborhood kid.  No, nothing ever became of that though he will always hold a special place in my heart.  

Something must have happened for me to find a new interest.  He was older ( in 6th grade!!), loud and had the blondest hair I'd ever seen.  He lived in a different neighborhood and I clearly remember seeing him at lunch daily.  I could even tell you where we each sat.  I was friends with a girl that knew him and when I confessed to her one day during gymnastics class that I liked him, she was the first to urge me to act on it.  She said that his last girlfriend ( really?  We're talking elementary school! Do I have to deal with this soon?) looked a lot like me and therefore, she insisted that he was bound to like me too.

I can't blame the next part on anyone but myself.  My way to win his heart was by writing a love letter.  How the heck I still have a fondness for correspondence after this experience, I will never know.  I pulled out my Holly Hobbie stationary and wrote to him.  Now I don't remember the details but I do know that I wanted it to be a secret.  I probably told him all the things I liked and didn't disclose my identity.  I sealed the letter in the envelope and added his address to the front...........and my return address to the top left corner.

I put the letter on the counter where we always put the outgoing mail and my mother asked about the letter.  As I explained, she cautioned me that if it was a secret letter, I shouldn't put the return address on the envelope.  At that age, I probably thought that there was no way to fix it and just said that I didn't care, please mail it anyway.

This, people, is the tough part of parenting.  I don't know that I would have handled it the way my mother did and I don't know that there is a way better than another.  I might not mail it for my kid or I might explain the implications of an act like this but my mom just did as I asked and mailed it.  In the end, I suppose I wouldn't have a story to share today and I wouldn't have learned a lesson if she didn't put it in the post box. 

Mail never gets where you want it to go as fast as it did that time. It couldn't have taken more than a day before I was standing in the lunchroom being teased.  I was mortified.  I was furious and I wanted to hide but somehow, I maintained my composure and looked those kids in the eye and said that I didn't know what they were talking about.

A couple of years later, I was confronted by this boy's older brother.  He wanted to know if I was the one that had sent that letter and even as a very young teen, he won me over when he told me that he thought I was pretty cool.  There was something unspoken between is for years; like he knew my secret but wouldn't hurt me with it.

I started this story today thinking I would tell you something funny but as I was writing, I wonder if that day was one that made a big influence on how I am as a person.  Not that it could possibly be the sole reason for some of my traits but it's certainly interesting to think about the things that I can still relate to.

I certainly learned about being embarrassed that day and I have always done what I could to keep others from feeling that way.  It's awful and the feeling lingers like a dark cloud.  I have a VERY small circle of people that I share private thoughts with.  That girl, among others, taught me that you have no control over the info that others share.  I knew she said something to that boy and when confronted, she never denied it. Once I cleared away that cloud of embarrassment, I realized that it is ok, in fact good, to laugh at yourself. Lastly, sometimes it's the person you would least expect that becomes your ally.

upgrade

It all started with a Christmas wish.  I don't make a list of things I want for Christmas. I would rather put effort into getting something special for others than think of myself but this year when my mom asked me if there was anything I wanted for Christmas, I gave her a few ideas.  I think I'm an easy person to shop for. Maybe that's the problem; I'm too easy to find things for.

I was a very happy girl to receive two 'wish list' items this year.  I don't expect gifts and especially now that we have Giada to spoil, I  assume every one's effort will go into making her holiday spectacular.

The first item was a cookbook I have had my eye on.  Can one have too many? No way!  Some of my best baking has been a result of recipes by this author and her simple approach to everyday cooking is right up my alley.  Since she uses a lot of veggies the dishes only require a simple modification for me to enjoy sans meat.  And the baking.....did I mention the baking?

The second item was a photo editing program I have been researching for a while.  Jackpot!  I had already decided that I would buy it for myself but then I got it as a gift. Score!  I couldn't wait to start playing.  Well, If you haven't noticed, I haven't added pictures t my last few posts.   This would be due to 'technical difficulties'.  In all the research I did about this awesome program, the thing I failed to check on was the operating system required to run it.  Needless to say, I didn't have the correct one and I had to upgrade.

I got a great deal on the upgrade and the install went nice and smoothly until I realized that I also needed to upgrade the memory and clear approximately 50gb of pictures off the computer.  I'm computer savvy enough to figure that stuff out.  Once I did that, everything ran like a dream.  Figuring out where everything was is a task  of it's own but I'm getting there.  Now, there's just that annoying squished screen thing left....

I'm not too proud to ask for help and at this point, I had my share of technology so I reached out to a friend that gave me some suggestions and eventually a link to the new driver that I needed.  SUCCESS!!! 

You have no idea how happy I am!  It only took two full weeks to get to this point and now I just need to learn this new program.  Please bear with me!

Question Three

"Do you think you are the same person in 

life as you are in your head?"

Is 'absolutely not' enough to answer this one?  I'm guessing that you'll want me to expand on that, huh?  

I think that anyone answering this would have the same answer.  I find it hard to believe that anyone could answer this with a 'yes'.  For so many reasons, I have to say no.  I try to be the best person I can.  I do that for myself but I also do that for everyone in my life.  I want to be a great mother; one that teaches, comforts and makes my daughter's eyes light up.  I want to be a great friend; one that remembers to call when it's important and also when it's not, one that remembers a special occasion, one that holds your hand and one that laughs with you. I want to be a great employee; one that gets the job done, exceeds expectations and one that is reliable.

When I look at all of these things, I realize, I want to be the one that anyone can count on.  I don't want to fail.... for me, but more, I don't want to fail the people that rely on me to be the strong one.  

I'm getting better at this.  In the last year, I have finally learned that sometimes, it is ok to be weak.  It is ok to ask for help and it's ok to allow others to be to me what I have been to them so often.  In this leg of my journey, I am listening more and in doing that, I am learning how open some people are.  It's inspiring.  I have been told how I am viewed by them and it has opened my eyes more than I thought possible.  It has allowed me to find strength in some qualities and strive to smooth out the rough parts of the qualities I don't care for. 

In all of this, I know I will never be perfect but I feel blessed to have surrounded myself with amazing people. Many of which I don't see or speak with often enough, but every single one has influenced me and have been a source of positivity.

I am a different person to everyone that knows me....in whatever capacity....but in the end, I know that I am strong, full of love and able to laugh at myself...... and those qualities are hopefully seen by everyone.

Question Two

"If you could travel anywhere in the world, 

where would you go?"

(I'm throwing this one in this week as well to catch up. Next week, I will be on-schedule with Questions #3)

This question assumes that you are able to travel without concern to time or finances so I will answer it that way.

For years, I have said that Italy was where I wanted to go and while I still do, I have found that there are so many other places I would love to visit as well.  I don't consider myself to be well-traveled in the least so I would be happy getting to just experience something different.  Having had some travels outside of this country and feeling as though I was isolated from the culture, my dream would be to travel Anthony Bourdain style.  See the beauty in new places but immerse myself in the culture and the local food.  Eating "American"  food in a foreign place is not what this girl is looking for.

I love sun and sand. I love adventure. I love food.

 

For those that know me, you know that my relationship with my family in Sweden continues to strengthen and I so adore them.  Getting to see what is home to them would make me so incredibly happy so today, if I was handed an open ended ticket, I would first visit them.

Question One

"Before calling someone....do you rehearse what 

you are going to say?"

Looks like I lucked out on Question One.  Some of these questions are really going to test my ability to speak with impunity.  While it lasts, lets get this question answered.

You would think that an answer to this would be a simple Yes or No.  I can never seem to see things in black and white.  My whole life is a series of grays....warm and cool shades both included.

Business....well that depends on what it's for.  I hopefully have some reason I am calling so  I already have a plan of what I am going to say or ask for.  In leaving a message for someone I don't generally speak with, I always state my name at the beginning and then again at the end with my phone number.  I always say my number super slow because I don't want the person listening to replay the message a bunch of times to figure it out.

When I call a friend, there is no rehearsal. Those of you that have received a voice mail from me know this with absolute certainty.  I am usually surprised by the beep to leave a message.  The result is a scattered message that could range from a "call me" to a 3 minute message about nothing and me getting cut off by the machine.....which is usually when you'll get the "call me" message because the machine will ask if I want to review the message and when I do, I immediately veto it to avoid sounding like a crazed person and just leave a simple message.  Plus, I rarely listen to my messages so I expect nobody else does either.

52 Questions

In an effort to keep me on some sort of regularity in posting, I have a plan.  The other day, I stumbled on the idea of keeping a memory jar.  You write down good things on scraps of paper and throw them into the jar.  At the end of the year, you reflect on those memories.  I want to do it but realized that my blog and my pictures have been doing that for a while now.  This year, it's Giada's turn.  She's super excited about it so we are searching for the perfect jar and will be adding to it soon.

 For me....in the same vein, I found a list of 52 questions that are intended to spur entries into a journal but since this is my journal, I will cut these all out and draw one for each week and share with you.  Some of these questions are a bit scary for me and require that I give up my insecurities about who could be reading this.  I guess it's a lesson in growing.

I would love your responses and answers to these questions as well! 

some of the 52 questions

hold me accountable

New year, new start, new goals.......

Isn't that what everyone thinks?  It's a time to reflect on yourself.  It's a time of hope and a time of change for the better.  For the last week, I have been reading and hearing about everyone's resolutions.  I am even seeing evidence at the gym where the "Resolutionists", as I have coined them, have arrived in droves messing up my daily workout routine.

I am one of those people that doesn't make resolutions.  No proclamations from me on what I will do better in part because I have the same goals every single day;

1. Smile
2. Make someone else smile
3. Appreciate everything
4. Be Positive
5. Laugh
6. Use my manners
7. Thank others
8. Find something happy in my day 
9. Eat well
10. Exercise
11. Do something for my soul
12. Be productive
13. Take time for the ones I love

I'm sure this list could be a lot bigger but these are the things I can think of at this moment.  Many of them go hand in hand with others but can also stand on their own.

For the last couple of years, at some point I have done something from my undocumented bucket list. They aren't the traditional things like visit a specific place or jump from a plane....I overcame an obstacle. For example, I am an awful runner but I ran few 5K races ( and plan to run more this year).  This year, I will stumble across something else and even though I will be scared, I will find the strength to do it.  I will follow through.So, if you have to pin a resolution on me, it's that I will overcome, I will succeed and I will conquer.